Thursday, November 20, 2008


don't you love how i follow heartwarming warmth with this? well, i just wanted you to know. if you hear C say "f*ck off" he is actually saying forklift. i promise. sometimes he gets feisty/excited about the forklift so he shouts it a little. it's "fork. lift." i promise. also, if you hear R say "f*ck" she is actually saying "truck." well, she is actually saying "fruck" but she means "truck." i promise. and let us not forget the "peach" confusion. we review the proper pronunciations. a lot. i promise. besides, f*ck is not even one of my most favorite curse words. if they were mimicking, it would be something else. but. if you hear R or C saying "punk ass mother f*cker" well, that one is mine. all me. and if you hear me saying "punk ass mother f*cker" i am actually saying "punk ass mother f*cker." and you are probably driving too fast. or too slow. or you cut me off. or you're on my ass. and i'm going to stop now. this post is so sending me to hell that i feel compelled to wish you happy holidays so i can end on a good note.

happy holidays


iggee said...

Hahahahaha! Love this post!! Love it!

My mother unintentionally taught me to swear like a sailor. I remember proclaiming, "Well, Jesus, Mary and Joseph!" one day over something... I have no idea what it was. My mother looked at me and said, "Stephanie, Do as I say, not as I do." So, it was ok for her to cuss, but not me?! wtf?! <---- I obviously didn't head her instruction.

Luke goes around saying "See it?" which come out sounding exactly like "Sh*t". Funny stuff when a stranger looks at you funny in HEB.

Jenny said...


Thanks for the laugh, I needed it!

Smooch said...

I kept making my friend's son say "dump truck" because it came out as dumb f*ck. It will all come back to me in spades.